Seven Habits of Healthy Families Planning Quality Time Together

An important characteristic of healthy families is that they spend time doing enjoyable activities with each other. With the demands of school, work, sports and technology, it’s sometimes hard for families to connect and spend meaningful time together; but there are ways to make sure quality time happens regularly. When you fit it into the family schedule, the same way you fit in a dentist’s appointment or a baseball game, this valuable time will become habitual.

“Try planning family ‘dates.’ Enter an official family date on the calendar where everyone can see it. The date can be anything from going to see a movie together to spending an afternoon at the park,” says Karen Kleinschmidt, who has worked with children with ADHD, sensory issues, and behavioral problems.

Here are some positive habits every family can incorporate into their routine:

Play together

Get down on the floor and play with your child, or run around the house playing hide and seek. It doesn’t matter what game you play; your child will be happy to be doing one of his favorite pastimes with you. “A child just wants to interact with the parent more. That’s the whole point,” says Darcia F. Narvaez, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Notre Dame. “Playing with other children may be fun, but nothing beats the joy and satisfaction of getting one’s parent to play with you.”

Eat together

Whether it’s home-cooked food or takeout, sitting down to eat as a family creates an opportunity to find out about everyone’s day. For children, it’s a chance to rejoice in their successes, ask for help with their failures, and share their worries. For parents, it’s a chance to be a part of their children’s everyday lives and to talk about their own experiences.

Volunteer together

Giving your time as a family creates a sense of accomplishment and pride in helping those less fortunate. Have each family member choose a cause that’s personally meaningful, and support that person by getting involved. Once everyone sees the differences they’re making, volunteering can become a much-loved family tradition.

Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D., psychologist and marriage and family counselor, says, “Whether repairing a wall, cleaning up a trail, or staffing a food booth or a Girl Scout cookie table, there is something very satisfying about working together. The banter, laughter, and problem-solving that go on strengthen and deepen family relationships.”

Learn a new skill together.

Whether it’s yoga, painting, or a foreign language, show your children that it can be fun to learn something new. Pick something that works with everyone’s schedule and make a point to attend every class until the skill is mastered. Children will not only learn a new skill, but also recognize how dedication to a task equals success.

Exercise together

Choose something that the whole family can do. It can be as simple as taking a 20-minute walk around the neighborhood or gearing up for a hike in your favorite national park. Leave all electronics in the car and soak up the peace and beauty of nature.

Read together.

Whether it’s a bedtime story for little ones, board books for kids just learning the basics, or a chapter book such as Harry Potter, reading out loud allows children and adults to visualize the actions taking place. It also strengthens a child’s aptitude in literacy and helps build a love of books. With older kids, choosing a book together and reading it to compare notes is a great way to encourage bigger conversations and strengthen your bonds.

Laugh, cry and show affection together

Sometimes laughter really is the best medicine. Whether it’s watching a funny movie, telling corny jokes, or acting silly, having a good chuckle is something a family can enjoy together. Sadness and grief are a part of life, but sharing these emotions with others can help lessen the pain. This also reinforces the message that it’s okay to show emotion and it lets each person know they are not alone. There are times when words are not enough, and a warm embrace can help convey message that the family is together and each person is valued.