In early November, North State Parent interviewed Kelly Doty, director of the Youth for Change Strengthening Families program that operated out of The Family Place on Bille Road, in Paradise. Kelly, working with a staff of four, was excited to talk about the program, passionate about reaching out to families on the ridge, committed to fostering community and neighborliness. A few days after we spoke; the Camp Fire hit.
Like so many others, Kelly’s story of evacuating is one fueled by the connection of community. She remembers the phone calls and texts that confusing morning, “People were alerting one another. I got an evacuation notice, but others did not.” She remains grateful for those who contacted her and the ability she had to contact others. “Now we realize how important relationships are, how important life is.”
Kelly and each one of her staff lost their homes. Kelly had lived in Paradise for most of her life; her family moved to Magalia when she was four years old. Both of her sons have called Paradise their home since they were born. She says, “Every house I’ve ever lived in on the ridge is gone. Six, no seven places I called home. Gone in a single day. And now the house I brought my babies home to,” she pauses, “Their homes are lost, too.”
Each of the families served by The Family Place in various capacities, from drop-in playtime groups to supervised visitations, is now dislocated, struggling to understand the depth of their devastations.
The Family Place was not destroyed. The physical building somehow survived. However, the fact that the building still stands, amongst so much devastation, doesn’t guarantee a future for the program at that site. The heart displayed by the staff is hurting yet, like that of so many thousands of other survivors, beating strong. They have their jobs; they have work to do. The Strengthening Families program has been relocated to the Oroville Family Place for now.
Kelly’s two children are facing the same challenges all the schoolchildren from Paradise are grappling with: new schools, new classmates, loss of friends and neighbors, all the familiar aspects and routines of their young lives altered. As a child development specialist, she’s concerned. “I think the ripple effect is just endless as far as their education; this will set them behind from preschool all the way up to 12th grade. Their education is going to be impacted.” Her advice, “Reach out. Reaching out to other people that were in it. This is a shared experience that is going to bring people together.” She adds with a smile, “Be extra nice to everyone.”
Kelly can only think in the short-term, for herself, her family, her staff, the program families, and the program itself. She must. Right now, she’s thinking of the present, meeting the needs of survivors. No one has any idea of how or when Paradise will rebuild, no one can predict what will be required to facilitate a return of residents to the community they once called home. The slow process of rebuilding is going to impact residents on a personal level, and this will undoubtedly influence the infrastructure of the re-emerging town as well.
“Strengthening Families will continue,” she promises, “it will just look different. Like everything else.” The program was able to give one of their families, a single mother, and her children, a fifth-wheel trailer for temporary housing. As to the future, Kelly says, “Everyone has been in this fog; everyone I know affected by this fire is in a fog. If we can find out that families will come, we might set up some meeting groups for counseling. I think people just need a place to tell their stories with others who have gone through this.” She adds quietly, “Are going through this.”
What if resilience means carrying on elsewhere? Until Paradise can rise from the ashes, families need to live in the here and now and if they can’t do that in their hometown, where do they build a new sense of community? Kelly admits she doesn’t have the answers to these hard questions. People’s lives have changed irrevocably, but while her community is waiting to begin recovery, whatever that looks like, The Family Place at 1717 High Street, Oroville, is continuing to offer support and resources to any families who contact them.
“Resiliency?” she muses, “I feel fortunate. I have my family. I think families are resilient. They have to be now. That’s the one thing they have left. Everyone keeps saying, “I’m so lucky.” People have lost everything, and yet they still feel lucky. I think that says a lot about what matters. What matters most.” Ó
Posted in: Community
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